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The Human Touch Blog ~
David Farrant

Godforsaken Nonsense

Sorry to be ‘boring’ but it really has been quiet again today so far.

Not that I mind. Sometimes its nice to be able to get on with things undistracted. (‘Undistracted’ just started flashing with red-underlying as a spelling error … ‘not in dictionary’. In other words, not a word. Well, I just can’t be bothered to check it because it looks right to me, so it is a word now!).

As nothing much has happened, there’s precious little news. ‘Babs the Witch’ is still facing the wall, and I’m going to hide it completely next time I get any visitors (except the person who so kindly gave it to me). Gareth has seen it now, incidentally, and he agrees its enough to off-put anybody. If any newspapers accidentally saw that, they could probably quite rightly accuse me of ‘practising black magic’! Either that, or I’d be accused of turning the place into another ‘London Dungeon’ complete with hideous old aged witchcraft relics.

Which reminds me, talking of aged relics, somebody sent me a link very recently to a short film on You Tube interviewing different people about ‘vampires’. I have never seen so much rubbish in all my life. I just couldn’t believe some of the puerile nonsense (about what sort of stakes should be used to ‘stake vampires’) some people are prepared to say just to get themselves on television! More astonishing is that a tiny handful of people actually accept such claims, and even go on to try and defend these by way of acquiescence or in the name of the Church.

To hear such God forsaken nonsense (meant quite literally here) is to make one wonder where you draw the line between sanity and insanity; or rather insanity trying to pose as that which is sane. It’s a very sick world sometimes, that’s all I can really say. Give me ‘Babs the Witch’ anytime, I say! At least any evil there is contained within an inanimate object, and its always open to you to simply ‘throw it away’.

As I believe I mentioned in a reply to someone here yesterday, I actually got a response to the Metro article from one of my first girlfriends who I had not seen since 1962. Well, I suppose it does go all over London, so I can’t imagine who else might have seen it. Probably many more people out of London now, now that we have posted it on my main Website.

Letters scarce in the past few days. Could be one of those local ‘go slows’ at the local Post Office, I don’t know. Only one letter really of interest but . . . I don’t know who its from! Definitely meant for me that’s clear as its addressed personally to myself, but the person just signed a ‘close friend’. Came here, so obviously nothing to do with the Metro this one. It wasn’t nasty, just one of those ‘seductive’ anonymous letters which tell you what the person feels but don’t tell you anything about the person.

Looking through some old quarterly magazines today for possible research material to include in the new chapter. Most about Robin Hood, but there’s stacks about myself with pictures as well. All good stuff as its all complementary! Nice to be appreciated sometimes, even in retrospect! In fact, I am not overlooking ANY past material. It will all be included if it is relevant, as some of it clearly is. Its got an ISSN so its ideal material for reference.

Well, that’s about it for today everyone. Everything is still quiet, so I guess I’ll leave this until tomorrow
David

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12 responses

  1. hi David
    i checked out that newspaper link u sent me and it’s funny as hell.
    how stupid can someone be to believe tony robinson was really posting!!?
    the whole thing was blatantly a piss take.
    i cant be arsed to read thru all the pages and listento all the rubish so can u put it a few lines, but whats all this bullshit about robin Hood?
    the whole story seems to be dumb.
    do people believe robin hood was a vampire or what?
    talk about mental!!!
    even if he existed he was probably the sum of a load of different thieving characters but still a brilliant old english yarn.
    do me a favour and just give me a straight forward account of the stupid tale.
    is it true that bishop bonkers went there and held an exorcism?
    cheers
    Craig

  2. What?!! The whole bloody story! Its really too long. Guess its a fair question though but I’ll have to back to it later as I’m right in the middle of another chapter at the moment.
    Basically some very niave person wrongly got it into their head (as per usual!) that somebody genuinally posting on some Robin Hood Website was a friend of mine, when my friend knew nothing about it! My friend reported this to his local authorities for the illegal use of his private emails and this was given a case number. Then last Monday, he went into to see the editor of his local newspaper to show him the emails and explain the position and that the two people concerned were two well known local trouble makers and trying to exploit the Robin Hood legend.
    ‘Conspiracy theories’ started flying around in the middle of all this and I merely pointed out how unsafe these conspiracies could be.
    In fact, this turned to be proved true, as the person thought to be my friend turned out to be a lady that they actually knew.
    God! The mentality!
    I know you were asking about the ‘vampire angle’ but I really must get back to the chapter.
    I’ll finish it later . . .
    David

  3. Craig, according to legend, “bonky” went to the site and sprayed holy water around whilst reading prayers in an effort to hold the “vampire” in check.
    Yes, you’re spot on, it’s mental.

  4. -“As he (Bonky) was doing this, he held a candlearbra aloft and shouted . . . “Behold the Light”!!!”
    Did you witness this with your own eyes? (I rather doubt you’d be in the same location with bonky at the same time!) Maybe it is a secondhand account of what was witnessed by “spunky”?

  5. You asked about whether the reputed ghost of Robin Hood seen near his alleged grave was a ‘vampire’.
    The simple answer to that is ‘no’, because vampires simply do not exist.
    It is true, however, that certain people tried to make up ‘vampire stories’ connected with this ghost (even saying that they had visited the grave when they had not done), but that also only remains fiction which some people keep blindly repeating.
    I attended the grave in April 2005 with a few others to join in a Blessing ceremony there, that is true. It is also true that I have since been accused of ‘trespassing’ by some people when the person I actually went there with had a letter of permission from the land-owner to visit the grave.
    She herself stated that she did not consider that we were trespassing, as she had permission and that I only escorting her through the somewhat ‘dangerous woods’ as it was getting dark.
    But I never went to the grave believing that there was a ’vampire’ there, although I was fairly convinced by this stage that the area was haunted.
    Hope that answers your question, Craig.
    David

  6. Yes, that’s right. I’ll let Craig answer that as no doubt he’s got his opinions.
    Just to say, that as he (Bonky) was doing this, he held a candlearbra aloft and shouted . . . “Behold the Light”!!!
    I kid thee not!
    David

  7. No. I didn’t witness this Cat, I am just repeating the account he gave to some magazine (around 1991, I believe). I would imagine it would have been quite difficult to witness, in any event, because it never happened!
    I have to admit, though, I did reconstruct the line “Behold the Light” for a film crew when I went to robin Hood’s alleged grave in April 2005.
    Couldn’t resist it really, as it was so funny!
    David

  8. I heard elsewhere, that a companion of ‘bonky’s’ fell into a bramble bush when the police turned up at the site while all this ‘exorcism’ was allegedly going on.
    Columbine.

  9. Yes, and the whole group ran off before the police could catch up with them, thereby evading the true course of the law. The unfortunate ‘associate’ met with the brambles during the police chase.
    Allegedly of course…
    Columbine.

  10. The story is, that it was not actually the police who ‘caught up with them’ (on this occasion) but a spectral “wailing hag” that sacred the life out of them and caused them to all run away.
    The unnamed assistintant then fell head-long into the bramble bush!
    David

  11. A ‘wailing hag’ eh? Guess ‘bonky’ wanted to ‘clothe’ the police officer in hag clothes, to pretend that he wasn’t trespassing…!

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