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The Human Touch Blog ~
David Farrant

Fact Out Of Fantasy


I just didn’t have time to write my usual main Blog yesterday. I was caught in the middle of sorting out a load of letters and legal papers, and didn’t really want to get too distracted. I managed a quick reply (or was it two?) and that’s about all.

Its good to see a couple of people have ’returned’ to the sixties; which is an interesting subject. Bit complicated to cover, but still interesting. I see also Cat is being discussed again (albeit indirectly under his Internet name), mainly by Craig and Barbara. He’s a bit ‘of a handful’ to deal with at the best of times as he always asks questions which (he hopes) are too embarrassing to answer. While this usually applies directly to myself, sometimes the dear animal has a tendency to involve others in his ‘micky taking’, as Barbara and her recent ‘side-kick’ well know!

But the point is right that Craig makes now: the ‘cat thing’ is a joke about an event that never happened; a supposed event from 35 years ago in the past we should remember. If anybody is on the receiving end of this cruel joke frequently being revived in the present by only one sad individual (well, two now he’s been joined by another person who apparent prefers darkness and deceit to truth and light); it is myself. Myself, and myself alone, let us remember.

When people are seen to support such untrue and cruel statements (as you were, Barbara), you can hardly be surprised when people react to such malicious statements accordingly. I can accept that the ‘true originator‘ here was not yourself, Barbara. You probably went along with most of it for ‘fun’ or to humour the perpetrator (probably a bit of both!); but the point is the perpetrator’s motivations were entirely malicious, hence all the reaction this caused. I can accept that you were to some extent ‘caught in the middle’ of it at the time, and were not in this respect harbouring undiluted hatred against myself. I have already said as much elsewhere, and I hope you have also been aware of this when we have spoken on the phone.

I can take your point that jokes about Cat going to the vet to be psycho analysed (or have died and now ‘speaking from heaven’ or such-like), could be seen in bad taste. But ONLY if they were intended to relate to events as you see them, which they in fact did not. Nobody is supporting animal cruelty here, Barbara (I would not allow it for one thing), and the standing joke about Long John Baldry’s cat (which died naturally of old age incidentally), relates only to a ‘joke event’ that never even happened. THAT, if anything, is the only ‘joke’. The funny thing arising from it I suppose, is that there are actually people around who would try and make none existent fact out of sheer fantasy. If anything is ‘sick’ at all, I would say that is!

Not the sort of thing we would ever hear ‘preached from the pulpit’, I hope. Even from a liberally-minded 1960’s one!

I may write a little more for Tuesday tonight. See how the work goes. I just thought I should clarify this issue for the moment,



10 Responses

  1. cheers for that david. i was half expecting u to have a go at me! lol
    the thing that bugs me about this story is that nobody seems to want to scream the follow up headline of ‘baldrys cat found alive’! they just want to scream the first mad headline.
    i remember u telling me that the cat came back to him after a few days. did he ever apologise over his comments? i suppose good news isnt headline worthy enbough so people probably still thought the cat was dead when it ewas actually alive and probably being fed loads of fish!
    what ever happened to the real john baldry?

  2. Bloody Hell!
    What’s all this noise about CATS and CAT SNUFFING then? Since it’s coming from the Lady In Green, Squire Craig and the Wizened Wizard of Must-Tell Hill, against my better judgement I will nip in for a comment and quickly nip out again.
    I can tell you Farrant never laid a boney finger on me, or any cat I know of. You will obtain no further comment from Baldry as he is presently “touring Blues Singer Heaven”!
    Craig, behave yourself! And Ms. “Village” Green…watch where you tread. There is still a small matter of a nicked shaving brush which the victimised party could bring a “case” before Scotland Yard at the drop of a hat, should they so choose.
    And Farrant…I hear tell you have been tidying up your flat! Could it be in anticipation of “overnight visits” from a certain “girl with no name”?
    And no….I haven’t been taken to the Cat Psycho Hospital….or to a “flea treatment centre”! I am quite busy with “cat business” and that is all I can say for the moment!
    Miaow to you all.
    -John Baldry’s Cat

  3. CAT!!!!
    where u been mate? this place isnt the same without u!
    u missed all the fun a few blogs ago. the real barbara green showed up instead of the fake one.

  4. Ah Craig…well for one thing, you have been lax with Farrant…allowing him to avoid anwering questions. He’s beeen tidying his flat, moving heavy furnishings….and we must know the reason why! Innocent domestic chores? I think not! Cherchez La Femme! Now WHICH bird is it; the Adoring American Fan….the Local Girl With No Name…or the Old Flame Which Still Burns For Him!???

  5. Craig, your duty is to investigate and determine the status of the following….
    1. Local Girl With No Name
    2. Adoring American Fan
    3. Old Flame Which Still Burns For Him
    4. Female Psychic Enthusiast
    5. Rural Vicar’s Wife
    6. Innocent Schoolgirl Journalist
    7. London Pub Waitress
    8. Former Blonde Bombshell
    That should be enough to keep you (and I daresay, HIM) busy!

  6. Yes Craig, she did indeed turn up and despite past differences she’s welcome to stay here!
    Well, I see Cat has turned up again, but there’s no need to welcome him with open arms. I’ve been having a bit of well-needed peace lately.
    Anyway, as he’s answered your questions, there’s no need for me to.
    As he said, Long John is doing heavenly tours and up ‘there’ with him . . . somewhere!

  7. See what you’ve done now Craig. I knew he’d start!
    Well, if its any consolation, he did say he’s nipping off again for a bit.
    Hope so! Then I can get on with moving some more furniture . . . in peace.

  8. I just knew Cat would start again!
    Let me just say this: With the exception of number 1, when I get my flat back in order, I might just start working my way through that list!

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1946 - 2019




From the vaults ...

A flashback to one of David’s comedic, profound or quizzical blog entries. Dive into the archives to find more gems. 

But I’ll Try

Well, 3 days has sped by, as usual. I sometimes wish man-made time would slow down a little and just give important things time to