What Can I Say?
3:45pm Fri 19 Aug 11
It seems Bournemouth has been “singled out” for harsh treatment by malign forces. We recall a spate of UFOs sent to disturb our fair coastal region in 2007 and suspect that the current unpleasantness originates from the same demonically infested individual”.
Oh dear! I was just sent this report by somebody who spotted this in the “Bournemouth Echo” yesterday. I wouldn’t mind, except that ‘I’ am the ‘demonically infested’ person who was supposed to have sent a ‘biblical flood’ upon the quiet town of Bournemouth yesterday. That newspaper reported that Bournemouth had suffered the worst rainfall for 30 years, and it was possibly related to a similar UFO invasion upon this fair Tourist town (previously reported by the reliable “Bournemouth Echo”) in the latter part of 2007. Needless to say, I was the ‘black magician’ held for being responsible for these alien disturbances, and , not least, for causing one particular resident to take refuge in his loo outside his bungalow on a cliff-top in Bournemouth.
What can I say!? It is true that I am in personal contact with the Commander of the alien invasion force who plan to return to the planet Earth very soon, to ‘escort’ certain earthlings to their distant planet of Bonkinite for the purpose analysing, and eradicating certain forms of evil human behaviour.
Well best of luck to them, I say! But when I read silly newspaper repoprts such as this, it makes me wonder exactly what I am supposed to have done to such people?!?Can anybody enlighten me? For I’m at a bit of a loss here!!